Not just a Legal Sea Foods paper placemat–Frank and I each got a Legal Sea Foods paper placemat inscribed at length with a Legal Sea Foods”pledge.”
I was still pretty shell-shocked after my long day in court and the drive back home–Frank, bless him, had the energy to take me out for a dinner of crabcakes, and then to read his placemat and burst out laughing.
Here’s what set him off–the eighth of nine separate pledges:
“We pledge…To respond in a rapid, sensitive, and non-confrontational manner to requests that will enhance your dining experience.”
My spirits revived as we tried to imagine a restaurant where the waiters are confrontational:
- “Just water to drink? Oh well, if you’re that stingy…”
- “You spilled that cup of chowder–you clean it up!”
- “No dessert menu for you–you’ve eaten enough.”
Finally Frank said, “I guess that might be the kind of treatment you’d get…at ILLEGAL Sea Foods.”