CERN’s Microcosm garden holds four giant chunks of classic physics equipment. Even if they were unlabelled, which they aren’t, you could guesstimate their chronological sequence using my Star/Wars/Trek Method to diagnose One-ness, Two-ness, and Three-ness.
One-ness: Early members of a high-tech sequence get built on mega-ideas with micro-money, by enthusiasts running on caffeine and pizza. To diagnose one-ness, look for stuff cobbled together. In the CERN garden, their first particle accelerator is built of unshiny sheet metal and old plumber’s pipe on a model developed for Rutherford back in the 1930s. Definite one-ness!
Two-ness: Most great ideas never get past the stage of one-ness, sad to say. But sometimes they do–sometimes the first item was such a big success, you get actual money to do what you love, only better! The best diagnostic for two-ness is craftsmanship plus simplicity. The original wild-eyed dreamer eagerly hires big-unionized workers who already know how to make big shiny things. The goal in stage two is to make something gorgeous that will do all the great stuff you wished you could do at stage one.
In CERN’s Microcosm garden, “two-ness” marks the gorgeously gleaming silver rocket-shippy thing that would look perfect with alien tentacles severed by rayguns mere microns away from the space-maiden’s shiny bikini–but I digress. And this “rocket” is really a CERN bubble chamber formerly known as BEBC, which unpoetically means “Big European Bubble Chamber.”
Three-ness: Three-ness marks the onset of “no more mistakes.” Let’s be responsible here–thousands of people depend on this project’s success. The mark of three-ness is shiny Frankenstein stuff–as if the skilled craftsmen of stage two now get conflicting orders from five different foremen. Let’s build a sphere–no, a tube–ok, a sphere on a tube. Give it lots of portholes–no, give it seams for access–no, both seams and portholes! I’m sure that’s not how the big copper resonator for CERN’s recent LEP experiment got designed, but you have to admit, that is very much how it looks. Definite three-ness.
Giant projects need three-ness, (and four-ness (and five-ness!)) CERN (where are they, ten-ness?) seems to be doing much better on all this than did the Star Wars franchise. No JarJar Binks, yet,–and hey, thanks for that World Wide Web thing, guys, really enjoying that!
There’s a lot of great one-ness that couldn’t get built in the first place if it didn’t have somebody else’s good solid three-ness to build on top of.
p.s. This image is part of a series from a great Fark contest for Star Wars vs Star Trek. This version was uploaded by Fark photo-ninja And-1!