Betsy Devine: Funny ha-ha and/or funny peculiar

What if…Lord of the Rings had been written by someone else?

“I’m not saying they had an affair,” Elven Prince Legolas said in an exclusive interview. “I mean, I once went out with Arwen — she was kinda chilly, if you know what I mean. But right after I got to Rivendell I saw Frodo coming out of her bower….

Ellis Amburn channeled by SevenONine

I assert that Balrogs do not have wings. For, it is a natural impulse to act to preserve one’s life, and in doing so, to make full use of one’s capabilities. If the Balrog did have wings, it would not allow itself to fall to its death in the mines of Moria, but save itself by the use of its wings…

Thomas Aquinas, channeled by Captain Amazing

Frodo and Sam, having thus disposed of both the ring and Smeagol
Decided that they deserved a nice vacation, and flew off to the Bahamas by eagol.

Ogden Nash, as channeled by jr8

Thanks to Maia Cowan for pinging me about the Teemings extras!

Talk about a geeky event–sxsw Interactive has two different blogs–an unofficial one and now an official one too–and its own Orkut community.

It’s funny, considering how introverted I was as a teen–and how many hours I spend each day alone with my computer–that I’m looking forward to meeting so many new bloggers.

At least I don’t have to learn a new language, except for kickball…..

What’s the difference between a blog and a website? Amy Wohl got me thinking about that this morning:

It’s not fair for me to reprint Amy’s whole post here–much as I am tempted to do so–and I didn’t even get to the three-layer cake…

Light spring snowfall today–special effects snow really, just enough
to make the world look pretty but not so much that you were in danger
of skidding. Car windows have just a tiny, brushable frosting. And on one parked car
I drove by, driving home tonight, someone had hugely printed the word
“PEnis.”

I had to smile, remembering my long ago fascination with the word
“uterus.” I must have looked it up in five dictionaries, and all of
them said about the same thing, “a sacklike organ where the fetus
grows”, and none of them gave me the tiniest little clue about why
conversations including the word “uterus” embarassed my mom so very
much.

At least my snowfall graffiti-ist has probably seen a penis, or has
some idea what one looks like. So he (or she) is way ahead of where I
was with “uterus.”

Congratulations are in order today!

• To Worthwhile for hiring Halley.
• To Enoch and Tania, who are expecting a brand-new baby this coming August.
• To Dervala, for having life just about figured out as she heads toward Meetup.
• To Scott, for a whole year of RSS search at good old Feedster.

• Boston
  Globe just added a list of feeds.

  

• BBC News has a list
  of its feeds and a huge OPML
  file.

 

• Christian Science Monitor
  has a list of
  feeds.

 

• CNet News has a list
  of feeds.

 

• DanGillmor’s column has a feed.

 

• dotJournalism has a feed.

 

• Downing Street
  Says has a feed.

 

• Guardian
  Unlimited has a feed.

• Inter Press Service
  News Agency has a list of
  feeds

 

• National
  GeographicNews
  may have a feed at http://news.nationalgeographic.com/index.rss

 

• New
  Scientist has a feed.

 

• NewYork
  Times
  has many feeds created by Userland.

 

• Philly.com
  (Philadelphia Inquirer) has a list of
  feeds.
   
• The
  Register has a feed.

 

• Salon has a feed.

  

• SeattlePost-Intelligencer
  has a list of
  feeds.

 

• Slashdot has a feed.

 

• Slate just
  got a feed and
  offers a reading list in OPML.

 

• Telegraph has a  list of feeds.
   
• US National Weather Service offers regional weather alerts as RSS feeds.

 

• Wayback Archive
  Collections has feed of
  its most recent acquisitions

 

• Wired
  News has a list of feeds.

 

• World Press
  Review has a list of feeds.

 

• Yahoo News has feeds for non-commercial
  use

• Dave
  Barry has a feed

 

• This is True
  by RandyCassingham has a feed

 

• Tapestry
  has cartoon feeds including Dilbert
   

*  This list of newsfeeds is based on the excellent list at http://www.djh.dk/ejour/arkiv/RSS.html#udland, and on many ongoing updates from Dave Winer. Your corrections and additions are very welcome!

I just stumbled across my twelfth-grade English text. Amazing to see those old doodles of flowerpots–they saved my sanity during hours of sitting-still-listening.
What I wrote in the margins:

• “have you got something on your mind?” so close to real situation, but just cliché way of opening conversation.
• Describe a person’s character thru his actions. Show, don’t tell, what he’s like. Due Mon.
• Irony: by parallelling 2 contrasting ideas, you underline one of them.

Years later, I still don’t “get” irony. But in lectures these days, I draw much better flowerpots….

I just found a great old post by Teresa Nielsen Hayden on “Mary Sue”.

MARY SUE (n.): 1. A variety
of story, first identified in the fan fiction community, but quickly
recognized as occurring elsewhere, in which normal story values are grossly subordinated to inadequately transformed personal
wish-fulfillment …

[for example] Galadriel’s secret love-child (Aragorn’s unacknowledged daughter) who runs off to join the Company of the Ring, sorts out Boromir’s problems, out-magics Gandalf, out-fights Aragorn during the melodramatic scene in which she reveals her true identity, demonstrates herself to be so spiritually elevated that the Ring has no effect on
her, and wins Legolas’ heart forever.

I loved this, and was all set to blog that Robert Heinlein falls deep
into this trap in some later novels–until I discoved Teresa’s
commenters had already said exactly this.

What would Mary Sue do in my situation? Drink exotic poison and die a
lingering death in the arms of Johnny Depp, as mascara ran down his
cheeks on a riptide of tears….